Most of us face issues with self-love and with self-judgment. We can spend hours, if not days or longer ruminating over one thing we think we have said or done “wrong”. Are you taking the time to balance that out and also give yourself credit for all the things you do “right” every day? If you are insulting and berating yourself instead of giving yourself credit and love, do you feel that is motivating or dis-empowering? When we begin to show ourselves love and gratitude it’s both motivating and empowering. It is an affirmation to our soul that we love ourselves and appreciate life and from that space true miracles can occur.
Whatever we focus our energy on expands. If we begin thinking that something we have said or done is wrong, it can appear to grow before us in weight and heaviness. When we are insulting ourselves and putting our energy there, the solutions don’t come from that. We all need to take responsibility for our actions. I am not saying to excuse any behavior, but I do know from working with clients and my own experience that most of what we feel we have done or said wrong is an extreme exaggeration and no one is thinking about it as critically as we are. Ruminating over it makes it grow in importance and can take away from your self-esteem making you feel weak which affects all areas of your life.
What if at night you thought of all the nice things you did for others that day? Maybe you held a door for someone, gave a friend or co-worker a compliment, called a friend or family member you knew was having a rough time, let someone ahead of you in line, made a meal for your family… there are so many nice things we do in a day and we are so quick to dismiss those and focus on what we did not “do right”. When we start to pay ourselves gratitude it can feel downright uncomfortable. We are simply not used to it. If we start to do it on a regular basis, we can begin to notice we are standing straighter, feel more confident, have more energy and are radiating light and love to those around us.
Love begins with us. We reflect out to others how we expect to be treated. We cannot have self-love without giving ourselves some well needed pats on the back. Just as you would be quick to thank someone or give them a huge hug for something they did nice for you – you need to begin to do the same for yourself!
I ask when you notice the things you feel you have said or done “wrong” that you give yourself credit for even noticing. Ask yourself if there is anything to be done about them. Perhaps you would feel better if you apologized. Maybe it is not a big deal at all and the only thing you need to do is forgive yourself and make the intention to react, say or do something differently the next time a similar situation presents itself. I am asking you to make note and then to move on instead of letting it grow in importance. Only you can give yourself permission to do this!
My challenge for you? Tonight and for as many nights in a row as you can – think of one or two things you did or said that day that you are happy with. Maybe you completed a project at work. Perhaps you reached out to someone or told someone how grateful you were for them and felt their love and appreciation for you. Maybe you made healthy food choices and exercised. You know there are things you did today and things you do every day that make your life and other people’s lives better. It is time to focus on these! I guarantee if you do this for a week you will feel more energy, lighter and the Universe will react accordingly – bringing you more and more experiences to be grateful for.